Stale Book Review #39: To Live Is To Die

To Live Is To Die by Joel McIver

Cost: $0.75US

Page Count: 270

When I was a young teen, very young in fact (like 13), I had a close friend who was a metal-head just like myself.  However, where as I was one to gravitate towards bands such as Guns N' Roses, Rush, and other not as heavy fare, my buddy was a die-hard Metallica fan.  Needless to say, we ribbed each other mercilessly for our differences in tastes.  Of course there was a mutual respect there.  I, for example, loved Master of Puppets.  He loved Power Windows, by Rush.  So, good natured teasing was par for the course.  Truthfully, at the time, I had not developed a full appreciation for the Metallica guys.  That would come in time.

My friend is now a world-renowned studio engineer and mixing specialist.  Fucker's won a grammy for fuck sake.  Me?  Well, I'm just a lowly blogger.  Our path's took decidedly different turns. Musically, he was far more advanced than I.

So, I pick up To Live Is To Die.  As my many dozens of readers know, I am a huge fan of rock biographies.  This one, however, was bound to take me back to an earlier time in my life when me and my buddy were listening to way different music.

This book centers on the life of late Metallica bassist Cliff Burton.  Now, I know enough about the band to know that diehard fans split the group into two eras:  Cliff-era and after Cliff-era.  Early fans are all about the Cliff albums:  Kill 'em All, Ride the Lightning, and Master of Puppets.  Truthfully, aside from KEA, I enjoy this era, too.

The figure of Cliff Burton is fairly well-developed in To Live Is To Die.  I actually felt like I knew the guy a little bit after reading the book.  Of course it starts off with young Cliff and his family.  But, thankfully, the book doesn't delve too deeply into early childhood.  Where I know this is important, it usually bores the fuck out of me in these music biopics.  This one really kicks into his music career fairly quickly.  Thanks, Joel.

Cliff Burton was many things and these are plainly stated by folks interviewed for the book.  Cliff was musically gifted, loved his bass and effects, had a solid foundation in music theory and was steadfast in his ways.  The dude wore bell-bottoms in the thrash metal realm for fuck sake!  But, what I found fascinating were the personal details about the bassist.  He wasn't about money or fame and hated being called a rock star.  Cliff was humble, intelligent, and incredibly kind to everyone.  If he were alive today, I am sure he would be the most approachable member of the group.  No doubt.

To Live Is To Die delves deeply into the making of the first three albums and Cliff's role in the production of each.  The other members of Metallica looked up to Cliff.  Not just because he was a bass virtuoso but because he had a great sense of what was right and wrong and what was just inherently cool.  Cliff never would have put up with the garbage that became Load and Re-Load, for example.  He was more important to that band than anyone can fathom and this book emphasizes that point.

To this day I am not a huge Metallica fan.  Lars Ulrich gets on my nerves whenever I see him on the television.  Maybe if we met in person it would be completely different.  But, I do admire the guy's drive and determination.  I personally think that James Hetfield is one of the most gifted rhythm guitar players of all time.  His precision is unparalelled.  Kirk seems like an easy going dude as well as super talented.  But, after the black album I just lost interest in the band.  Maybe it's because I am no longer the angry young man I once was...people grow up, right?

One caveat about this book:  the author goes a little far in Cliff's performances on the three Cliff albums.  It's like, "Check out his fill at 0:34 of Call of Kthulu"...which he does a whole lot.  It got annoying after a while.  I wasn't listening to Ride the Lightning while reading the book, dude!

Overall, this was a good rock book and gave much insight into a figure in metal that is often overlooked or forgotten.  Cliff Burton was good and made those first three Metallica records thrash metal classics.  But, it cannot be overlooked how genuine and forthright Cliff was as a person.  I was a little saddened when I finished.  I knew the ending just like I did when I read the book on Dimebag Darrell but it still didn't deaden the effect.

I did go back and listen to Master of Puppets again after reading the book.  Fuck, that thing is STILL a classic.  

Stale Book Review #38: Idea Man

Idea Man by Paul Allen

Cost: $4.99US

Page Count: 358

Paul Allen has done so much in his lifetime.  Philanthropy, the Experience Music Project, Vulcan, space travel initiatives, the Brain Institute, and has owned the Seahawks and the Trailblazers.  It really has been a magnificent ride for the man.  Paul Allen has been able to achieve so many things because of one thing:  his relationship with a fellow named Bill Gates.  Gates and Allen got rich as balls together.  Money gives you so much freedom to explore.

You see, back in the day, there was no operating system that resembles what you are reading this blog on.  User interface?  Fuck that.  Computers were for programmers; for nerds.  Paul Allen and Bill Gates changed all that with their fledgling company, MicroSoft.  Maybe you've heard of it?  I thought so.

Like any autobiography, or biography in general, Idea Man goes all the way back to Paul Allen's childhood.  The Allen family were not broke asses but weren't the same as the well heeled Gates family.  Anyway, what I found the most interesting is that Paul's folks always supported what he wanted to explore.  That, to me, is what is the most fascinating aspect of Mr. Allen:  He is ALWAYS willing to explore what moves him.  To me, that is super-rad.

Back to the story.  Paul meets Bill very early on and, even though Paul is older, the two strike up a friendship that will last quite a while.  The two have a love of technology, yes.  But, what is striking is their differences.  Bill Gates is analytical and a wicked talented programmer.  Paul is the big thinker;  seeing what could be and what will eventually come to exist.  Paul Allen was the one who said, "why can't every person have a computer?" during a time when a computer could fill up the entire floor of a university building.  Big ideas for the time that have definitely come to pass.  Shit...I have a computer in my pocket during every minute of the day.  Paul Allen thought of this first, folks!

The duo go on to found Microsoft.  Most of this section of the book soured my perception of Mr. William Gates.  There are adjectives that get thrown around about Bill:  genius, visionary, blah blah blah.  But, as Allen reflects back on those early years of success, one adjective comes to my mind:  asshole.  Bill Gates is a shrewd businessman.  Often in business, that level of shrewd is misconstrued as assholism (can that be a new word?).  I know that these days Gates is a super-philanthopist and that is awesome.  Glad to see that, Bill.

Paul Allen eventually leaves Microsoft with bunches of stock that eventually gets him a net worth somewhere in the neighborhood of many small nations.  This allows him freedom to explore.  The human brain, outer space, rock and roll, football, basketball, yachts...etc.  Paul Allen has had his fingers in so many interesting ventures it really is hard to keep track.  In the book, it appears that Allen has trouble keeping track, too.

Idea Man is a pretty good read.  Paul Allen is one man that is not afraid of risk.  I read somewhere that he has lost many, many millions (like in the hundreds of millions) of dollars taking chances on what he views as worthwhile ideas.  I love that level of risk taking.  It's punk rock, Paul!

The section of the book regarding the purchase and running of the Trailblazers is friggin' hilarious.  It's probably not meant to be, but it made me chuckle.  If you are into professional basketball, I highly recommend at least reading this section of Idea Man.

Well, folks, that's Idea Man.  Interesting life of a risk-taking, philanthropist explorer.

Yes, this is Paul Allen's 'boat'.

Stale Music Review #14: Buck 'O Nine

28 Teeth by Buck-o-Nine

Cost: $3.99

Track Count: 14

I've been listening to 28 Teeth for soooo many years.  This album is another one of those "time travel" records for me...takes me straight back to my early days of just being out of college and drinking copious quarts of beer.  It never fails...every time I listen to the record I feel like getting an Olde English.

Buck-O-Nine has been around since the early nineties, yet nobody really knows that because grunge was king during that time.  So, the SoCal (San Diego, to be exact) band hashed out their sound and perfected their craft for a few years before releasing the ska masterpiece, 28 Teeth.

I won't spend too much time on the band itself.  They're still going strong and their website is pretty good.  Good check it out...www.buckonine.com.

One weird sidenote about this band.  I went to see Primus (Primus sucks!) and lo' and behold, Buck-O-Nine were the opener.  It was such a weird pairing but I had a blast.  Or at least I think I had a blast.  Malt Liquor, folks.

Here's the track run-down and some funsies about some of them.

1.  Round Kid.  Love this song.  Seriously, cannot get enough of this one.  It's a go-to when I need a little pick me up.
2.  Nineteen.  "Anything is possible".  Great song.  It moves and grooves, folks.
3.  Albuquerque.  Another fun ska tune.  Upbeat with motion...lyrics are inconsistent with the feel of the music.  Which may be why it works.  The horns are great on this one, though.
4.  Tear Jerky.  The horn section in this band is so fucking tight.  Really great players.
5.  I'm the Man.
6.  Jennifer's Cold.  This song is hilarious.  Such a mundane topic.  I should research this some more but I have a feeling that it was written as a serious diss to someone named Jennifer.
7.  Steve Was Dead.
8.  What Happened to my Radio?.  Remember folks, this album came out before any streaming services existed and iTunes appeared.  So, we spent much time with the radio...you know, the real radio?  Seems so archaic.  This was Buck-o-Nine lamenting how shitty radio was back then.
9.  Twenty-Eight Teeth.  Title track showcases just how good the horn section is.
10.  Peach Fish.
11.  Record Store.  Once again, back in the day, kids, we used to go to places called record stores.  Where they sold CD's and Records.  Weird concept, right?  Great fucking tune, though.
12.  My Town.  The standout track on this album.  "My town, my street...".  Listen to this and just try to be depressed.  I fucking dare you.
13.  Little Pain Inside.  Goofy song.  Filler.

Twenty Eight Teeth is a throwback to the days where radio existed, record stores existed, and ska music was actually well regarded.  It's a great record; definitely worth the forty minutes or so to let it run end to end.  Give it a try, fuckers!

www.buckonine.com
www.asianmanrecords.com

Stale Book Review #37: Bicycle Diaries

Bicycle Diaries by David Byrne

Cost: $3.99US

Page Count: 300

"And you may ask yourself

Well, how did I get here?" 

- Once In a Lifetime, Talking Heads

Sitting down to read Bicycle Diaries made me feel a little bit smarter; a little bit more cultured.  This has everything to do with David Byrne's writing style and his obvious love for the written word.  The dude just oozes high culture.

To be frank, I never really got into the whole "art rock" movement.  Maybe it's because I hail from central Florida and nowhere near Central Park in NYC.  But, I was never drawn to the avant garde or the true artist freak culture.  Therefore, much music has not entered into my field of (aural) vision.  Sonic Youth, Nico, The Velvet Underground...don't know much about them, at all.  They seemed just a bit too "high society" for a poor Florida cracker who grew up on the teats of Creedence, Skynyrd, and Zepplin.  But...I did like the Talking Heads.  So, I've got respect for Byrne even though he is definitely more cultured than I.

While on tour and while traveling, David Byrne often tools around various cities on a bicycle.  Hence, the name of the book.  In my book, this is pretty cool.  There is no better way to truly get to know a new place than from the saddle of a bike.  Byrne writes about these jaunts through foreign cities in Bicycle Diaries.  Paris, Sydney, NYC...they are all beautifully painted by Byrne in such a way that the reader can practically smell the shit on the city streets of Manila.  David Byrne is an artist.

To some extent, Motley Crue singer Vince Neil is an artist.  He creates music so that is an art.  But, it's super one-dimensional.  Not to disparage the Crue or Vince, but in the grand scheme of life their "art" is stupid as fuck.  It plays to the retarded masses...that's why I like it.

But, there is something MORE to Byrne as an artist.  Music, painting, photography, etc...these are all arenas in which I feel that the author could express a high level of expertise whilst in conversation.  This level of artistry and knowledge weasels its way into his writing.  The city streets become canvases; the bike his paintbrush; the words his paint. 

This book, in my honest opinion, is fucking difficult to describe.

There are times during the stretch of Bicycle Diaries where Byrne is too wordy, a bit pretentious, a lot erudite, and sometimes pompous.  It doesn't happen much but there are times when I was reading when I muttered, "Just get to the point, fucker".  But, these moments are overshadowed by the fact that the book is well-crafted and amazingly well-researched.  This author knows his shit.  And he knows it.

It took me a long time to finish Bicycle Diaries.  I read it here and there...never truly getting engrossed. I attribute this to the writing style;  it can be heavy.  It was read in chunks and pieces and not by chapter.  It's probably because I am just a lowly blog-writing dude.  But, this book, in the end, turned out to be pretty good.  Very informative. 

I must say that Bicycle Diaries ain't gonna be for everyone.  But, those that stick with it are definitely going to learn something.

If you like music, musicians, and travel journals give this book a shot.  

www.davidbyrne.com

www.rockhall.com

A Few More Pages to Go...

Ok folks.  Just a few more pages on a book I'm currently reading and then...new posts!  At least a couple.  I've been hoarding words and am almost ready to release the Kraken!

Stale Book Review #36: The English Girl

The English Girl by Daniel Silva

Cost: $6.98US

Page Count: 473

There is something about Silva's Gabriel Allon series that is just kind of cool.  For the uninitiated, Allon is a spy for the Israelis.  He's also as masterful at restoring masterpiece paintings as he is with wielding a firearm.  Allon is a complicated figure that, like a ripened onion, has many, many layers.  This...is pretty cool.

In The English Girl, Gabriel Allon is called upon by high ranking officials in the British government to solve a small problem.  An English girl has gone missing.  But, no, this ain't no ordinary, jacked-tooth Brit.  She's a beauty, and she's smart.  It also turns out she is the mistress of the prime minister.  The plot thickens!

Owing some sort of debt to the Brits, Allon agrees to investigate.  With minimal help from MI5 coming, the master spy has to reach out to some unorthodox "friends".  These friends are on the island of Corsica, one man is an all powerful boss (think the Godfather) and one is an assassin.  The assassin has also tried to take Allon's life...Thomas Keller.  After little fanfare, an agreement is made between Gabriel and Keller and the two set off to find out what happened to Madeline Hart.

Their journey criss crosses the European continent:  Corsica to France to Great Britain to the heart of Russia.  It really is kind of a fun ride.

At the heart of the mystery is a Russian energy congolomorate that must be infiltrated.  For this, Gabriel calls in his team from Israel. The Israelis somehow find a way into the secretive Russian world that is still backed by old school KGB dudes.  From here, the house of cards tumbles and there is bloodshed and intrigue.  Good stuff.

I won't tell you if they get the girl (they do) or how they do it (trickery).  But, I can tell you that The English Girl is worth your time.  

A fun read, fo shizzle.

Stale Book Review #35: The Lost Island

The Lost Island by Douglas Preston & Lincoln Child

Cost: Gift

Page Count: 368

I am all over Preston and Child.  Love their Pendergast books as most readers already know.  Mixed in those books, they do their own thing and have come out with a series centered around a character named Gideon Crew.  The first couple featuring Crew were pretty good.  So, for the holidays, I asked for The Lost Island...the newest installment.

I'm. Glad. I. Did. Not. Pay. For. This.

This will become painfully obvious as to why towards the end of this review.

Here goes a ten-cent synopsis.  From here on out there may be spoilers so if you are a huge fan and going to read the book...turn back now!

Gideon Crew is a troubled master thief (reformed?) with a medical condition that will likely kill him within a year or so.  So, really, Crew has nothing to lose.  That's why he's willing to take on a mission to help out crippled, rich, eccentric Eli Glinn.  Glinn is a difficult character to get a read on...but, I bet the author's will explore him further in following books.  Anyway, Glinn taps Crew to steal a page from the illuminated text, The Book of Kells.  The difficulty?  It's highly guarded and in a viewing area where there are hundreds of folks.  Basically, it's an impossible theft that Crew (of course) pulls off flawlessly.

Crew is horrified to know that Glinn has now stripped the illuminated text from the stolen page only to reveal a map underneath.  I like treasure hunts, so I continued reading.

The paper which the map was printed on was a bit strange and Glinn and his science boys got to work in analysis.  This process was slowly revealed through the first half of the book.  Spoiler alert!  The page was actually made from humanoid skin...ok, the page was created from the flesh of a cyclops. This was just about the point in which I went...oh fuck.  I knew where this was going.

Glinn, now with a map, has sent Gideon with a mysterious and apparently pretty hot gal named Amy to find the island noted on the map.  Hence the name of the book, The Lost Island.  Turns out that this map was based strongly on a very famous journey taken thousands of years ago (think ancient Greece).  Glinn is very interested in a type of plant that reportedly has miraculous healing powers. With his condition, this interests Crew, as well.

So...Amy and Gideon are on a fancy boat cruising through the Caribbean looking for this island. They encounter troubles, shipwreck, indigenous tribes and finally a long slog to the actual lost island.
Upon this island they find...a cyclops.  A real cyclops.  Alive.

Now, I am all for the use of books to disappearing into a different realm or to suspend reality for a while.  But...a cyclops?  Man...

Apparently, ol' one eye is the last of his kind.  He's lonely and likes Amy...probably a little too much. Anyway, he has this plant and is pissed and huge.  Eventually all Hell breaks loose and things turn bad.  I'll let you read it if you want to but I'm not going to give away the actual ending.  I'm not an animal, you know.

The Lost Island is not a book I would have been happy to buy.  It was a gift so I was ok reading the book.  But, as far as the canon of Preston and Child, The Lost Island ranks pretty close to the bottom (if not the actual bottom) for me.