Stale Book Review #28 (actually #15) - The Association

The Association by Bentley Little

Cost: $3.95US

Page Count: 438

Bentley Little is most likely the creepiest author that is actively writing today.  King might be more prolific, and very creepy himself, Mr. Little is...damn his stuff is strange.

So, The Association.  I really enjoyed this reading this one.  In fact, once I picked it up I had an extremely difficult time putting it down.  Yes, it was on a sick, sadistic level, but it was very good.   I read it in two sittings.  Hey, my eyes get tired and need to take a break...suck it! 

The story goes like this:  Barry and Maureen are a couple that have bought a home in an exclusive, gated-type, fancy-pants neighborhoods somewhere of in them quiet hills of Utah.  The land of beauty, legend, and men with six wives and forty children.  But, I digress...  Barry and Mo (as I called them), begin to realize that something is just a little bit 'off' about their new homestead.

You see, this neighborhood is overlorded by a homeowner's association that takes the idea of the HOA to a whole new level.  The application process to even be allowed to buy in the exclusive, gated community must've been a strain on the buyers.  That sucks because Barry and Maureen are likable folk.  They're good people and appear to get along well with one another.  However, that yard sale is just not fucking cool in the eyes of the HOA.  The yard sale attempt and fine (yes, fine) are just the start of the madness.  It slowly snowballs from there.

So, over a relatively short amount of time, neighbors just suddenly start to up and disappear.  No trace.  Nothing.

Then there are the murders.

Then there are the dildos.  Seriously.

The Association is fucked.  But, in a really, really good way.  It's a mind-bender and I love that about Little.  He's never afraid to breach a subject or just take it one step too far.  As a writer, Bentley Little has some balls.  I respect that.

On a side note:  I live in a neighborhood with a homeowner's association.  I am petrified of them, now.

Stale Book Review #27: Not Dead & Not For Sale

Not Dead & Not For Sale by Scott Weiland

Cost: $3.00US

Page Count: 238

Not Dead & Not For Sale is a super-short read.  This is good because there really isn't a whole hell of a lot to this book.  I love rock books.  Seriously, I will post a picture of the shelves that line my walls that contain all the biographies of bands and artists.  I can't get enough.  So, when I saw Stone Temple Pilots/Velvet Revolver singer Scott Weiland's book for sale for a few bucks, I picked it up.  

I'm not sure about how I feel about this book.  Here are a few problems that I had with it:

1.  There was a noticeable lack of detail.  About anything.  Reading it seemed a lot like reading the itinerary for a professional conference.  I did this.  This happened.  This happened.  That's all.  Fuck, it got frustrating.  Tell me MORE, Scott!

2.  Weiland's relationship with Mary is complicated and convoluted.  Her book is the next installment on Stale Reviews.  But, Scott just glosses over it all.  Like it was not that important.

3.  I really enjoy reading about the creative process that is making music.  The interplay between musicians, bandmates.  Nada in this book.

4.  Weiland is a recovering hardcore drug addict.  The fact that he can recall any details at all is probably an amazing thing.  So...I try (TRY) not to be overly critical.  

But, despite these serious stylistic problems, I actually enjoyed reading this book.  Honestly, it was so devoid of any detail I got through the thing in about two hours.  Seriously.  And I'm not really a wicked-fast reader, either.  

In the end, Not Dead & Not For Sale left me feeling empty.  Was this intentional?  Is Scott Weiland some sort of mastermind in making the reader feel as he does most of the time?  If so...well, fucking spot on, dude.  If it wasn't intentional...well, fuck you Weiland.

Read this book if you want to.  If you are a big rock book doofus like me, you probably have already.  But, if you want a really good rock book read Motley Crue's The Dirt...fuck me that was a good read.

On a side note, I saw Stone Temple Pilots when they breezed through Tampa during the Purple Tour.  It was a memorable show becauseI got to see Mick Jones and Big Audio Dynamite and they were totally awesome.  Growing up, I loved the Clash so seeing Jones was a big ass thrill.  STP was really good, too.  In fact, they were WAY better than I expected them to be.  Just a killer set.

Mick Jones

That is all.

Stale Book Review #26: The Eye Of God

The Eye of God by James Rollins

Cost: $6.98US

Page Count: 401

It should come as surprise to no one that I am a huge sucker for James Rollins and his books.  In particular, the Sigma Force novels.  I'm not sure what the allure is, to be honest.  Maybe because a Rollins novel is like watching a really good action flick.  Plus, there is very little of the romance vibe that I normally hate in popular novels.  My thought is, if you want romance in a novel...read a fuckin' romance novel.

Anyway, The Eye of God is a recent installment in the James Rollins pantheon. Of course it revolves around the elite operations team of Sigma Force.  In this particular installment, Sigma Force is on the trail to recover a satellite that was thrust back to Earth after spending a little quality time within the tail of a comet.  Apparently, a little dark energy (dark matter) was detected and the science nerds want their hands on it to fully find out what happened.  The powerful folks want it back so that other powerful folks don't get it first.  One problem:  it crash landed in the remote regions of Mongolia.  

Luckily for Sigma Force, Commander Pierce and his lover/partner/assassin Seichan are in Southeast Asia attempting to hunt down Seichan's long-lost mother.  This is a whole story in and of itself.  But, this angle somehow weaves it's way back around and old mom makes her way into the satellite angle.  Interesting twist, but I won't give it away...as you know, I'm not really into spoilers.

The team converges upon Mongolia.  In addition to the normal Sigma Force players, you get some help from Vatican archivist Vigor, his granddaughter and Italian policewoman Rachel, and scientist Jada.  None of these newbies really add nor take away from the story.  They're just there.  But, that's ok.  There is a new Sigma operative named Duncan who has a pretty cool fetish that helps out the team in the end.  He's a cool character and I hope Rollins keeps him around.

The whole plot is centered upon found artifacts of the great Ghengis Khan...you know, the Mongolian badass?  Anyway, there is twists, turns, and threads that weave between the modern day and the ancient times of the great Khan.  Pretty cool and deftly done by the author.  

I won't give away the ending but the world does get saved.  But, you'll have to spend a few hours with the book in order to find out how.  

In the proverbial nutshell:  The Eye of God is a good read.  Fast-paced, fun, and has enough action to choke a Navy Seal.  Good stuff.

Also, check out James Rollins' website here.  It's actually not a bad site.  Kudos